It's easy to give up(Jack)

[Jack Allen Dorsal]

Jack wasn't sure if he should let go of her hand once she stood up, or continue holding it. He decided to continue holding it, since he'd put his hand out there in the first place. There was nothing wrong with holding a girl's hand, even if it was just for the hell of it. He walked her closer to the water, the moonlight on the lake as they walked along the edge of it. She asked about Shane. Oh, the dreaded topic. Taking in a deep sigh, he thought about his answer. Jack couldn't very well give away all of Shane's secrets, even if some of them were his own secrets. He just didn't know where to start with Shane's story, and tell it in a way that didn't make Shane seem too weak.

Kayla shivered as he thought, and as they continued talking and walking. "Are you cold? I could put my arm around you, but by the way you reacted earlier when I touched your face, I thought it would be better to ask first," he said quietly, glancing at her as he continued thinking about Shane. How to word this....Shane and I don't get along. He was brought up by my dad, and he doesn't approve of my job. Not a lot of people do. My dad is an abusive drunk.....Shane's used to a pretty big amount of pain as well," he said, feeling proud of himself that he'd figured out a way to tell Kayla about him without making it seem to terribly awful; although it was. Jack would never get over each and every time he saw Shane bruised up by the one person they were supposed to want to be. "If my dad ever knew what I did for a living, he'd never hit Shane again." Jack clenched his teeth as he thought about the day that Henry found out about his assassinations. Hell, maybe one day he'd be one.

[Kayla Sommers]

Kayla let Jack lead the way. It really was a perfect night to be walking around the lake, the night's sky reflecting in the pond. Jack still held onto Kayla's hand. It was.....kind of a strange feeling to Kayla, but good strange. Having someones warm hand wrapped around hers. Kayla wasn't used to affection at all. It was more of a wham bam thank you mam situation with her, only tonight it had been an extra wham bam and she had the bruises to prove it. Jack had obviously felt her shiver as he mentioned it, but what caused her to look up at him was when he said how she had reacted when he stroked her face. Kayla wasn't even aware she had reacted. "Reacted? I'm sorry I wasn't even aware I had reacted."

[/color] Said Kayla a little nervously.

She didn't even really know why she was nervous. It wasn't a scared nervous more like she was beginning to get butterflies in her stomach. Something she had never felt before. Kayla was going to have to have a think about tonight, post Unwyn, and figure out why she was feeling this way around Jack. "Anyway, yes you can put your arm around me."[/color] Said Kayla blushing a little. God, what was wrong with her. He then started talking about Shane, and she could understand Shane's situation. It seemed as though Jack really loved his brother, even if he didn't want to admit it. Just the way he spoke about him was enough to give away that he cared about Shane. "Maybe you should tell your dad what you do."[/color] Said Kayla jokingly, although she realised straight away that it wasn't something to joke about. "I'm sorry."[/color] She said, wrapping her arm around Jacks waist, getting closer to him as she still felt a little cold.[/blockquote]

[Jack Allen Dorsal]

Jack let out a soft sigh. She didn't even know that she'd reacted. Yes, it was a small movement, a look of her eyes, but Jack had seen it. It was invisible to him. He was good at observing and watching people. The slightest change hints to him a particular feeling or sensitivity. Kayla had flinched, denoting she was most likely afraid, at least for that short moment in time. Kayla gave him her consent to put his arm around and did so with grace and confidence. In moments, her arm was around his waist, feeling comfortable and nice. Jack hadn't had a girlfriend in a long time, if he could even consider that girl a girlfriend back then. He knew how to treat a girl and knew how to respect her, but he'd never truly had anyone to call his own.

Why was he thinking about that? Kayla was a girl he'd met in the halls a week or so ago and then saw at a bonfire party looking sad and dejected. Jack knew that was hardly anything to call a relationship. HOwever, having Kayla so close to him, and moving closer yet as she seemed to be colder, made him second guess himself. "I can't tell him. Shane will know I protect him from afar and probably attempt to attack me during potions or something," he muttered, rubbing Kayla's arm and still wondering what they were doign pretending they were....were they pretending? Jack couldn't tell. "Don't be sorry. I've thought about showing up in my dad's bedroom, all aflame, just to scare the living shit out of him and tell him to leave Shane be......the man is scary though," he grinned, glancing at Kayla next to him. The idea of Kayla being with Unwyn only a few minutes ago still bothered him. He had a hard time being where Unwyn had been. He imagined himself kissing her....and it made him seethe inside that Unwyn had already done that, and done it wrong. He imagined himself sleeping with her....and let out a big sigh. Again, Unwyn had already done it and done it in a way that was completely barbaric. "It's a nice night," he said quietly, clenching his teeth as he watched the moon on the water.

[Kayla Sommers]

Having his arm draped over her shoulders, lightly rubbing her arm made her feel warm and perhaps safe. She wasn't sure, she hadn't felt safe in years so this was all very new to her. Still she liked the way his fingers brushed over her skin, it distracted her from the sore point on her neck. "He would? But why would he attack you if he found out you had been protecting him all this time?"

[/color] Asked Kayla a little confused. She thought Shane would have been greatful to his brother, but then again they were boys and boys tended to be very proud beings and liked to think they could look after themselves. Even though alot of the time they couldn't. Kayla would keep that opinion to herself.

Kayla understood why Jack never confronted his dad. She had been in a similar situation with her brother, until finally she was left with no choice but to defend herself. It resulted in her killing her brother and so far she had gotten away with it, plus it was self defense. If she had had a choice she never would have killed her brother deliberately. "Yeah I know what you mean. Plus he is your dad, even if he is an abusive drunk like you said."[/color] It sucked that deep down you always loved your family unconditionally even if you didn't want to. Jack changed the subject about it being a nice night. "Yeah it is. I can't remember the last time I saw the sky so clear."[/color] She said, her arm still wrapped around Jack's waist. She noticed he had spoken through clenched teeth. He had done that a few times tonight, maybe she was annoying him or something. Kayla thought maybe she should leave and go back to her dorm, but she wanted to stay and hang out with Jack, so she asked him. "Is there something wrong?"[/color] She asked a little nervously, her whole body tensing a little as if readying to be beaten.[/blockquote]

[Jack Allen Dorsal]

Jack glanced at Kayla, knowing now that she'd seen him too many times upset in this conversation. It was the thought of Unwyn with her. What he did to her. If he was kind and gentle with things...Jack wouldn't be so upset. "I can't help but be pissed with the idea of Unwyn with you. It's disgusting." He said quietly, once again, for the hundredth time that night, clenching his teeth. Too much talk about his dad angered him.Thinking about Shane pissed him off. He needed to get control of his feelings.

So Jack stopped walking and turned to Kayla. "I'd like to take you dinner. A proper date. I pick you up, we go to Vakkar and eat. And that's all. Nothing else. No strings attached, either." He said, quite sure of himself. He said it in a way that it felt like he was telling her, not asking her. Jack scratched the back of his head before reaching out and taking her by the hand. "Because you are very beautiful, and you deserve to be treated like royalty."

[Kayla Sommers]

Kayla frowned as he spoke. Because she had been called so many names and treated so bad she thought he was referring to her as disgusting. Kayla pulled away from him and wrapped her arms around her waist as she walked next to him in silence. "Yeah well, beggers can't be choosers."

[/color] She said looking down at the ground. Kayla knew she was disgusting and pathetic, but there was nothing she could do about it. Everyone she had ever been close to or cared about had either left her or betrayed her.

Kayla would probably have fallen if she wasn't watching where she was going when Jack said he wanted to take her out on a date. She stopped walking and turned to face him. Her eyes widened slightly, probably because she was scared, no, she was scared. Kayla had never been on a date before, well she had been asked on dates but stood up. Kayla took a step back as she thought about her answer. "No I don't, I don't deserve anything. My mum and dad disowned me and I killed my brother, why should I expect anything else than this. I'm not beautiful and I deserve to be treated like shit because I am shit and I shouldn't have killed my brother."[/color] Said Kayla kind of angrily, tears stinging her eyes. She had avoided answering the question about the date and focused on the second part he said.

It was hard for Kayla to believe that anyone could be interested in her, want to help her and look after her. How could she believe it after what had happened with Unwyn. Fair enough she had got herself into that situation, but still, she didn't think she deserved anything better. She wasn't angry at Jack, as a matter of fact she wasn't angry at all. She was scared, terrified actually, that she was going to end up hurt again and she knew she wouldn't be able to handle that. Kayla had already tried to kill herself a few times and failed. If Jack hurt her then, like if he was just going to use her like everyone else had, that would push her over the edge. "Why do you want to take me out? There are girls so much better than me."[/color] She said looking back up at him with sad eyes.[/blockquote]

[Jack Allen Dorsal]

Jack watched Kayla carefully. She clearly didn't think highly of herself at all. Jack wasn't too surprised. Most pretty girls, the ones that were gorgeous on the inside as well as the outside, weren't always sure of themselves. But Kayla.....she wasn't just pretty, she struck him with a beauty that he had yet to understand. A beauty that she still needed reveal to him. The wonder that he saw in front of him was just the tip of the ice berg and he wanted to know her that much better. Jack listened to her talk about her killing her brother and how her parents disowned her. That was all the more reason she should let him take her out.

When the tears came to her eyes Jack felt bad. Sighing, he couldn't help but assume that he had caused those tears. She asked him why her, oh, he had answers, but they were so complex he doubted she'd understand. Kayla had stopped and turned to look at him. He diverted his gaze to the water, mulling over his choice of words. "Remember when we met the first time, in the hall at night? It was at that moment that I realized you had Shane's eyes. The same sad, dejected, I-hate-the-world eyes. And it broke me. I can help you. By...being there to hold your hand. By telling you you're worth it to someone. By reminding you that someone cares. There are plenty of other girls, but none of them are you."

[Kayla Sommers]

After being beaten for years, told she was worthless, shit blah blah blah and having everyone she ever cared about or loved betray her or just turn their back on her, it was no wonder she didn't think much of herself. For Jack to be asking her out on a date, she just thought it would end like how it always did. For Kayla to say yes to him was a big risk for her, she was terrified of getting hurt yet again, cos he would have just proved her right. But she was also tired of being alone.

As Jack explained his reasons for wanting to take her out, she brushed her cheeks, wiping away the tears that fell. It wasn't his fault, it just really hurt to talk about what has happened to her in the past. Every night she has nightmares, well when she sleeps she does. The dark circles under her eyes proved she hadn't slept in atleast three days and she was sure she wasn't going to be able to make it another day with no sleep. He didn't look at her as he spoke, but she nodded when he asked if she remembered when they first met. Kayla remembered her first thought being 'wow, he's hot.' But she never acted on what she thought. As usual Kayla kept her emotions locked away, most of the time anyway. She very rarely showed any emotion to another person if she could help it. She felt it made her appear more vulnerable than she already was.

When Jack stopped talking she stood there, in silence just looking up at him. So many thoughts were running through her head. Should she or shouldn't she. Kayla bit her lip nervously. She was so conflicted, but she decided to just be brave for the first time in a long time and not run away. Kayla took in a deep breath and exhaled slowly, steadying her nerves. "Ok. You can take me out."

[/color] She said, her voice quivering slightly as she was extremely nervous. That was all Kayla could think to say, now she was panicking whether he would actually turn up. Kayla still bit her bottom lip nervously, still unsure of what to say.[/blockquote]

[Jack Allen Dorsal]

Why was he saying these things? He had no ties to this girl! She was a girl he'd met what twice? But he was drawn to her. It was scary as hell, and Jack didn't understand it, but he was slowly enjoying it. The idea of protecting her. The thought of holding her hand and holding her...he could put her back together. If he couldn't fix Shane, maybe he could fix Kayla, and it would be almost the same thing. He surprised when Kayla said he could take her out. But what was his next move? She was vulnerable and fragile; he had to be careful. He never wanted to be the guy to break her completely.

"Dance with me?" He asked, once again in a tone that denoted she didn't really have a choice, but that she could say no to him. He was used to being control, except with Adyrian, but even then he held his own. HE stopped walking and held his hand out for her. So there wasn't any music and he really didn't dance; but he wanted her to feel safe with him, and what better than to do it while holding her close to him? Was he moving too fast? Was she going to walk away from him and hope she never had to be near him again? He certainly hoped not. He did'nt let any of those questions form on his face. He kept it unemotional, thinking with his head, not his facial expressions. "Full moon. A lake. Romantic as hell, right?" He grinned, his deep voice quiet, only for her.

[Kayla Sommers]

Kayla did find it a little odd that he seemed so forward, or determined to help her. It wasn't like they were close, hell they didn't even know each other. But Kayla had to admit to herself, even if she didn't want to tell Jack, just yet, but she was kinda starting to like him. Kayla began to twirl a strand of hair around her finger as she thought about this. The feelings she was beginning to have for Jack did scare her, but then she also wanted someone who she could trust, and basically just enjoy their company. She was tired of being alone. She had too much time to think. Jack was an assassin, which meant he could look after himself and possibly her. Kayla definitely had food for thought tonight.

He brought her out of her thoughts when he asked her to dance with him. Kayla glanced around and then back at Jack. "There's no music."

[/color] She pointed out. By this time, Jack had stopped walking and was facing her, his hand extended towards her. Her heart hammered against her chest as she instantly began to feel scared and nervous again. Her mind was telling her to run, and run far and not risk getting hurt again. But she also didn't want to run from Jack. She wanted to spend more time with him. Maybe he could get through to her and help her learn to trust and be happy again. That was all she really wanted at the moment. He commented on the setting. It was very romantic. "Yeah it is very romantic."[/color] Said Kayla slowly extending her shaking hand to Jack. Bloody hell was she nervous.[/blockquote]

[Jack Allen Dorsal]

Jack knit his eyebrows together slightly as he watched Kayla slowly, and shakily, take his hand. Whatever happened to her in the past clearly sent her over the edge. It made Jack mad for a second. Whoever did this to her, aside from her brother, he would find them. The more things she did that hinted toward her being hurt in more ways than one, the more he wanted to protect her. Jack had no idea how to do that, except to be near her all the time. He wasn't sure she was ready for that. With her hand in his, he pulled her in close. "You're scared. You're shaking. Why?" he asked quietly, letting his free hand rest right above her waist.

As he swayed with her, slowly turning in circles to no musice but their own, he couldn't help but wonder where this was going. He'd only been with her twice, and he was drawn to her. Jack knew he wasn't the greatest guy in the world, but he had enough ins that he could easily protect a girl like Kayla. The question was whether or not she would want his protection, and whether or not she was willing to enter into such a dangerous life with him. maybe not forever, but for as long as they were together. He needed to stop thinking of such a serious road and start thinking of the now. No. He should never get involved with anyone. It was incredibly dangerous; what was he thinking? "What happened to you, Kayla?" he asked, straight out, staring right at her.

[Kayla Sommers]

It didn't surprise her that Jack picked up on the fact she was shaking. Mainly because she was nervous but also scared. She had been tricked and used many times before and she wasn't going to let her guard down and assume the same wasn't going to happen now. Plus she was also cold. She really didn't think before picking out the outfit tonight, so the reason why she was shaking was because of a few, but he had been right about the main reason why she was shaking. Kayla inhaled and then let out her breath again, trying to steady her nerves. She had decided she was going to be honest with him. She was tired of hiding who she was. "I just don't wan to get hurt again. Happens all the time."

[/color] She said shrugging a little as they swayed softly.

Kayla's hands rest on his shoulders and she looked up into his blue eyes. Kayla liked blue eyes, so it was hard for her to look away. She was half tempted to rest her head on his shoulder but she didn't quite feel comfortable enough to be that physically close to him. He then asked her what had happened to her. Kayla tensed at the question. She was going to have to tell him if he was to understand why she was so pathetic and beating down. One thing was for sure, she couldn't look in his eyes as she told him, so she stepped closer and rest her head on his shoulder, trembling all over. "Well you already know about my family disowning me and my brother, who also hired a vampire to kill me. That's how I got the scar on my neck. I've also been in love twice and both times I've had my heart broken. It seemed when they got what they wanted they fucked off. I didn't even know they had gone until I heard people talking about it.[/color] Said Kayla. She paused for a second as she tried to remember everything that had got her to be like this.

"My best friend who knew everything about me, promised to help me, atleast help me learn how to defend myself but he didn't. Instead when his fiance went off for a few months, work related, he came on to me. Telling me that he never got over me blah blah blah but I didn't sleep with him. I told him if he didn't want to be with his fiance then he needed to break it off with her first. But when she came back he acted like that was the furthest thing from his mind. He then admitted to me that the only reason he said all those things was because he was lonely and basically wanted to get laid. After that I only had a couple of close friends who said they would help me but didn't. So I deliberately failed my last year, just so I would have somewhere to live. But I'm not going to be able to repeat my last year a third time, so once I graduate I have no home and no money. That's basically it in a nutshell, other stuff happened aswell but whatever. No one cared so why should I." She said. It wasn't until she had finished talking that she realised her eyes had filled with tears and spilled down her cheeks. She quickly brushed her cheeks, holding them back.

Kayla didn't know why he wanted to know as he wouldn't be able to help her. No one else had in the past, they had just left her to rot. Like her family had. Kayla still had her head rest on his shoulder and was still moving with him in slow circles, swaying from side to side slowly.[/blockquote]

[Jack Allen Dorsal]

Jack couldn't help but notice the gesture Kayla made by putting her head on his shoulder. She clearly did'nt want to look at him while she spilled her whole life story out to him. Why was he asking? Why was he making her relive memories he was sure she didn't want to think about, let alone tell a near stranger? Jack held her tighter as her story went on. It wasn't necessarily horrible bad things that had happened over and over again, it was the lack of support and encouragement as well. The girl had no one and could go nowhere for help. Jack really didn't have anyone to go to either, but he'd done that intentionally to himself.

She wiped the tears from her eyes and Jack held her away from him so he could see her. "I can fix all that. I can be there. I can talk to you, give you a home, give you money, I've got it all and I can give it to you easy. Just say the words," he said, looking from one of her eyes to the other. He wanted her to know that he could be there and protect her. Whether she wanted him for more than that or not, he didn' tknow, but he could at least give her those things. "You don't have to be alone anymore. I promise," he said, touching her cheek softly. His heart broke for her. He was always looking out for Shane, whether he knew it or not; he could easily add Kayla to his list. "Just tell me."

[Kayla Sommers]

Once Kayla was done telling him what had happened to her in a brief quick version, she was wishing she hadn't told him. Only because she didn't want him to pity her or promise to help her and then not, like everyone else had done. The things that had happened to her weren't horrific, apart from what her so called family did to her, but it was just that it kept on happening over and over again. It seemed as if she meant nothing to no one and would just get used, which is what had happened to her.

Jack then held Kayla at arms length and he started to promise her everything she had been promised before which ended up being a lie. His hand came up and lightly stroked her cheek as he went on. She didn't know what to say. Ofcourse she wanted to say yes, help me, but what if it was just another trap. Doomed to suffer the same thing she had the last seven years of her life. "Jack, I've been promised those things before and I just end up getting hurt. I'm not going to ask you for anything. I would rather be homeless and living on the street than be giving false hope in thinking that I got a place to go once I'm done here, only to realise it was just someone using me, again."

[/color] Said Kayla, her hands still resting on his chest. "So I'm not going to ask you for anything........atleast not yet. Not until I know I can trust you."[/color] She said quietly.[/blockquote]

[Jack Allen Dorsal]

Completely heartbroken. That's what Kayla was. ALl her life people had promised to help her and failed in doing so. He felt really bad, but tried not to let that show on his face as he was talking to Kayla. Her story was sad, and he wanted to help her, he jsut didn't konw how. All he could do was tell her he would protect her from as many things as he could, and promise to be there for her. He knew she didn't trust him; how could she? They continued dancing, and holding each other and yet...he knew she still had a hard time trusting her. Jack was just going to have to prove it. Everyone ahead of him had messed things up for him; he was going to have to try that much harder to make her see that he really was what he said he was. "Well, I hope I can prove myself to you. Any idea how I can do that?" he asked, putting a lock of her hair behind her ear and shoving his hands in his pockets. No sense in making hermore nervous than she needed to be. Looking at her, he could see how broken she really was. Sad. Alone. Well, those things he could fix, but the trust was going to be more difficult. But he had every intention of making her see that he was being truthful with her, and having her for himself would be something he hadn't had in a very long time. A girl. Someone to call his own. Someone to share moments with. He'd been truthful with her so far...eventually she'd trust him.